ird School #4 My We Dan Gutman Pictures by Jim Paillot To Emma Contents 1 I Hate Andrea Young 1 2 Finger Painting with Ms. Hannah 5 3 Weird People 22 4 What a Mess! 28 5 The Secret of the Teachers’ Lounge 35 6 The Museum of Hanging Garbage 43 7 Performance Art 53 8 The Friendship Picture 58 9 Mr. Klutz and the Secret Drawer 65 10 The Big Stupid Art Contest 72 About the Author and the Illustrator Credits Cover Copyright About the Publisher 1 1 I Hate Andrea Young “Miss Daisy! A.J. hit me!” “I did not,” I said. “He did too! He bumped his elbow against my elbow!” Andrea Young is so annoying. I barely touched her stupid elbow. She was moaning and holding her arm like an elephant stepped on it. 1 I wish an elephant would step on her head. Andrea has been bothering me since we were little kids. And that’s a long time, because now we’re in second grade. “I saw A.J. do it, Miss Daisy,” said Emily. She is Andrea’s friend and is just as annoying. But in a different way. “Am I going to have to send anyone to Mr. Klutz’s office?” Miss Daisy asked. Mr. Klutz is the principal, and that means he is like the king of the school. “No,” me and Andrea said. “Good, because it’s time for us to go to art class. I don’t want you to miss it. Our art teacher, Ms. Hannah, is really nice, and I’m sure she has some fun activities planned for you.” 2 “Art?” I said. “I hate art.” “Oh, you hate everything, A.J.,” said Andrea, who thinks she knows everything. It just so happens that I do not hate everything. I don’t hate football. I don’t hate skateboarding. I don’t hate trick biking. I don’t hate monster movies. Especially when the monsters crush cars and stuff. But I do hate school, and I especially hate Andrea. “I love art,” Andrea announced, like anybody really cared. She took out a big art box she had brought from home. It had crayons and colored pencils and other stuff in it. “When I grow up, I want to be an artist. My mom thinks I’m really 3 creative